Knowing what to do is very different than doing what you know and when something is new, you don’t, know it quite as well, so it tends to be even more hesitancy so part of what we’re doing in this compassion.
By you being in this environment is putting you in a position where, day and night, you’re thinking about this stuff and it starts to amalgamate it starts to connect because, as your brain gets overloaded.
The beauty of that is your conscious mind kind of disappears a little bit your unconscious starts to take over and that’s. What part of your brain that makes your heart beat a hundred thousand times a day without you having to think about it.
So immersion has that power that’s, the beauty, what we’re doing and the many you’re going to get these this program, you’re, going to go back through and a step at a time And you’re, going to repeat it, you’re, going to do that, spaced repetition by the way a video or audio or some combination of it may be using that time, no extra time so listening to it.
Maybe while you’re working out things of that nature, you’ll embed it even more! So let’s. Just assume you organize things. Well, I’m going to make sure tomorrow you leave with a real, clear plan the plans in front of you.
It’s already rock and roll. What is the single most powerful constraint as to whether or not your business is going to grow or not? What is it me? Meaning the business owner yourself and if you know the business owner the biggest constraint that you have an impact on is yourself and if you’re heard yesterday, when we talked and looked at home X’s.
Example, here’s, a company that’s, growing leaps and bounds in a multi-billion dollar business traveling around the world. The economies are tearing apart in many places and it’s growing, but the constraint that they saw was the vision of the founder.
What they were willing to believe as possible, and the great thing about them is like we didn’t know we didn’t know it. Wasn’t possible that’s, a very helpful thing, not to know just to go out there and do it.
How many of you, when you started out business, didn’t, know what you couldn’t do, and that was quite helpful. This is go ahead and say I me too. If I look back at stuff that I did back, then I think my god, that’s, unbelievable, I can’t believe I would say that or do that or try that, but what’s interesting, is in the beginning Of your business and when people are brand-new at something they’ll, try almost, but if you start to succeed, some of you are later in your life cycle, and so, as you start to succeed now you & # 39.
Ve got something to lose, and now you don’t implement the same level. You got something to maintain, got something to hang on to, and so you have to be cautious about that. But besides your own vision, the limitations of your belief revision, which hopefully you’ve, been expanded and we feel like that has been expanded, be shout it out here say I I know it has to.
I can see you never the conversations with you. You know each time you hear something you see a different perspective, a different way. Oh my gosh. There’s. Just so many ways. Take my business to the next level.
I don’t have to wait. I have to hope for some good economy. The worst economy is my deepest friend, because it’s, wiping out all my competitors and give me an opportunity to take market share or become the leader or take their customers or buy them for a song selling us kind of an interesting connotation, because In our culture, we think of salespeople, we think of high integrity, individuals who have a huge positive influence on the quality of our lives.
Tell me the first words you associate to a salesperson, great scumbag. Thank you very nice scumbag. What else manipulator liar greasy deceptive type of bread guy now how many of you in this room are salespeople? Let me see your hands if you’re, an owner of the business, you better, be raising your hand.
If you are a parent, you better be raising your hand, because, by the way, our kids, great salespeople – yes or no – I mean they – okay, teach them how to deal rejection. They just let it pass on behind.
Keep coming right. You can’t, have an ice cream cone. Ten minutes later, they’re licking on one, with a smile on their face right. No one thought of many scripts, no one thought of anything. What I want you to get, is it the single most important skill of life? We hate the word selling, so I’ll.
Give you a word that it really is that doesn’t have the negative connotation it’s. The word that all leaders have what would that word be influenced what changes? Companies is leaders the only way to change the company is leadership, and I want to change the company that I own and I want to make a shift in that company.
The number one thing I’m going to do is shifting leadership that might be taking leaders to a different level by by bringing new leaders in by the new leaders of new voices with new perspectives with new skill sets new directions.
But we need to take things for the global leaders solve problems and leaders maximize resources. If you’re going to solve problems, you can’t. Do it yourself, it would already been solved. You have to get others to help you to do it.
That requires influence trail. You need to get people to maximize resources that requires influence. If you’re going to get people to partner with you provide you resources, capital suppliers, anything that requires influence.
If you’re going to have an impact on your kids or your community or the world that requires influence, there is no more important skill of leadership than influence, and yet most of us think of it like selling and as a result, we don’t master influence, so I’m, not here today to try and get you to become a master of influence in 45 minutes or so by chatting with you here, because we have so many of the speakers.
This is the area of life. I am most focused on because I know that if you can’t influence, you can’t lead, but if you can influence powerfully intelligently with integrity, there’s, no limit to whatever you can envision and what you can Make real and if your influence becomes not just use the influence, but you’re able to influence systems, people company culture, if you can turn other people into influencers now, whatever you vision about, can be made into reality, and so as a skill of Influence we’re, going to ask ourselves from the agree, leaders or change companies right Hannity.
That say I and leaders number one still simple to the Greek AI, but then the question becomes: how do you influence? How do you inputs consistently with integrity? You can influence many ways you can do without integrity, but the good news is: we live in a world today, where, whatever you do it’s transparent to the world, because there are no secrets anymore.
Other I don’t. Think I have a secret today bless you, you can forget the secret with the internet with a culture. We have the way the world is today. There are no more secrets and whatever you think is stilled possibly keep secret.
Given three or four more years and it’ll be impossible. Every phone call you make is recorded there’s. No single phone call that goes in turn out in North America that they don’t have a recording of, and they can search by word by tone by tempo.
They can even recognize voices. Now there is little thing is such thing as privacy? Everything you’ve ever put on the Internet. Is there forever and people know it and can search it? The way you write is searchable.
Now you cannot sign you email. You can put on somebody else’s, email and the structure of your language and the way you’ve influenced things can be studied at this level. So the good news about that is manipulation as a ongoing tool for success is over, but adding value will never go out of style.
Truth delivers a lot of style, so influencing with integrity is the secret. But what really influences people do facts and figures? We give you the facts and figures out of course theories. I can influence people, no, it’s, the weaving of that story together in a way that produces what shifts people and that’s.
Human emotion. Ultimately, the big game here is emotion. You have to influence emotion, you have to influence the most of your people. You’re, going to maximize resources. If we all agree, as we talked about the other day, it’s, not a lack of resources.
It’s, a lack of what resourcefulness, if you’re creative enough, if your pipe enough, if you’re determined enough, if you’re focused enough, you can find a way if you’re. Giving enough if you’re generous enough.
If you’re honest enough, if you’re, courageous enough, you will get people to help you. You will find the way you will make. That thing happen. You’ll access, the resource. You get someone to coach, you teach you loan it to you, let you try, it drive, it experience it.
So it’s, the ability to influence emotion, because that’s. What affects our intellect that’s about a mine? Our core story is only there to give you a set of facts to educate someone that will make them emotional up to make a decision and what they do.
Is they go through a series of things that you have emotions about? It may save them in an unemotional way, but the only reason they work is because you know they’re, going to open the person’s. Emotion, how many agree with me on this AI? So as leaders, we can never forget the humans who are emotional creatures, including ourselves, and to influence other people.
We have to know what already influences them. We can’t ever forget what truly influences them. It’s, going to come down to our ability to connect with them at a deep emotional level or get others to do the same here’s.
How I say it a really simple term to influence someone. You have to already be influenced right to move somebody, you better be moved to touch somebody you can’t touch, somebody about your product or service or vision or idea, or your company.
If you & # 39, re not touched to persuade others, you have to be persuaded, you can’t give somebody else what you don’t have now. You may have it intellectually, here’s, the challenge we first meet. Somebody in your relationship and you’re all excited what’s.
A little energy like zero to 10, make the sound of that energy. You meet somebody you’re, totally excited by making it at six months. Six years. Twenty years later, that’s, scary at it, and it’s, not time because there are people.
I thought I’ve, been with them and together 65 years, and they’re still out of their mind for each other. They make the same amount of noise you did in the beginning here. What changes is very often when you’re around something enough? I don’t care.
What it is there’s, a law called the wall, familiarity blossom. Ilioneus is this: if you round something enough, you take it just a little bit for granted as a matter. What it is it’s, not that you don’t care if it used to it.
It’s that the variety of it is not quite as high it’s, not so new, and with that sometimes you give it less significance. Even though in your heart, you know it’s, significant you don’t, keep the aliveness of it.
It becomes something you intellectualize versus something you feel inside your body with a passion so that people say, but we love each other yeah. Oh, that’s great, you know hug each other every now and then you say you leverage gives you little kiss like.
That was that I was in the beginning. No, it isn’t time. It’s that most people, don & # 39. T understand that this emotion, this intensity. This passion has to be constantly reinforced every single day and like any muscle, if you don’t use it you.
So then you have the base. Understanding why you do what you do, but you lost the energy that makes it alive, and so, if you’re going to be touching people, you got to be types of than the question is: how do we influence ourselves? How do we influence other people? We got to get them into their emotions.
We got to get ourselves into the emotions they’re, going to move us to action. We got to do that ongoing because otherwise, all the stuff you wrote down will die. It’ll die in your book. It will die in your head.
There has to be a level of emotional hunger in you. That makes you go follow through there’s got to be a level of energy, knew that when you go share with people you’re able to influence them to follow through and when they don’t.
Do it enough to get back in there with them again and get them to do it again? This is where the whole game gets won or lost. You agree to disagree on this, so what we got to look at is first of all us.
How many do you have days when you wake up, and you feel like I, don’t want to talk to people today. I’m, going on digs, like this in your life, say aye, but again, as I said the other day, if you’re, the leader you don’t.
Have that choice. You’re, the leader you have to get in a good state. If you later, you have to get yourself in that place and how many of you have had some gut check. Some you see again in the last six months, 12 months in your business with economic economy.
Changing right has never changed before i’ma grab. Those got checks a I. So what do we do? We have to become masters of influence, which means we have to be able to master the state of our own organization.
The master state of our own organization got to know how to change that. How fast my friend’s house house and where does it have to start our selves since were the first constraint and if we can do with ourselves and influence, then we can teach everybody else to influence.
We & # 39. Ve said business. Is innovation and marketing you have to influence people to innovate because you’re not going to just do it because they’re used to what work it’s easier and they know it.
Innovation means massive. What change? How many people go give me more massive change in my life with all the other things I’m, trying to hang on to they’re, not going to do that, you have to influence people to innovate and marketing is influenced.
So what influences us is our state’s? How do we change our states? Let’s start with you and I and with anybody. I want to work with you work with me before. You know the first answer: if you’re going to change somebody state the fastest way to do it is physical trying to change somebody’s.
Mind is really hard change their body. Their mind will go you doubt it give somebody enough alcohol and just see how quickly you can change them. True, given of alcohol, I don’t care who they are. They’re, going to change.
What are you changing? Biochemistry physiology physical body and the emotion the mind will shift why people take drugs why people eat when they go e? It’s, a biochemical change in your body. So but we can do this through movement.
We can do this to change. So if you want to be the leader and you’re going to be affected first thing, I said all of you going home, so you don’t feel overwhelmed if you need to develop a ongoing discipline because we all are rituals, I mean a physical one if you want to say well, why is my life the way it is today? Look at your rituals.
What do you call them? Rituals are, not you have them most of you get up and you have a set of rituals. You go straight to email or your state workout or you have your breakfast or you hit the snooze alarm at least three times to ritual.
Who knows what I’m talking about here and if you want to know what somebody’s like you, can see, the rituals use a look at anybody’s body in this room. If you have to take their clothes going up – and you know some of the rituals or lack thereof, is it true? If every day you get up and your ritual, is you go to Starbucks and order a smoking book or whatever those things are that you have right: a big muffin and whatever it is right that’s? What you do every day, it’s, not hard to figure out what you’re, going to be.
Like my 10:30 in the morning, you’re gonna be looking for your next coffee and it’s. Whatever is going to stimulate your adrenal glands like crazy and they’re going to drop predictably, and we know what your stress levels can be like.
We know when your knees are going to go and say it’s predictable because of your rituals it in a certain way. You can predict that person’s, gonna be fat and tired in a different way. You know if a person eats and they exercise certain way.
You know what I was gonna be like who here works out five days a week, never misses it.’s, just your life. Let me see your hands. Look a little bit of a Bieber that’s fantastic. How do you, like everybody ham, that’s, really fantastic? Who here honestly never worked out consistently? Alright don’t? Clap is what’s interesting! I’m, not saying one is right as one is wrong, but with those two different rituals create a different body, yes or no.
If we wanted to really make it clear, we’d, say everybody works out five days a week. Stand up well, you look at them. Sit down every doesn’t work out, stand up, look at them, it’ll, be pretty obvious.
Now some people’s. Metabolism is different and get by with different things that use at the picture. Don’t you, your relationships today are the results of your rituals, and the first thing you ever get when you come home is honey and then you go and give a little peck on the cheek.
And then you sit down and start typing your emails or you flip on the news. It’s, not hard to know what your relationships going to be like you guys, might love each other, but it’s going to be one boring dead relationship.
It’s like having a brother or sister, but if your new ritual was and you just in the beginning, you made it ritual just made for fun. You say every day when I come home. The men I’m gonna do is already yellow my husband or wife’s, name or sometimes I want my wife’s, little crazy.
So I go Lucy. I’m all and then we both go running wherever she is now so everyone else we go running. Full speed, like lovers haven’t seen each other in six months. We do it ask my assistant all the time not every day, but it’s, our ritual to this process right it’s, just a crazy thing.
Thank you. Thank you. I appreciate the amp. I thought what I’m, telling you to do this. I’m telling us, because I want you create yours, because when you do that, and you’re playful and crazy and you do the regular basis that you can’t wait to see each other and the biggest ritual That we have besides physical by the way.
Let me just say to you this this: when you go home, if you want to transform your business, transform you by creating first, if you don & # 39, t really have one a set of physical rituals that you’re, not going to miss.
I’ll cure three days a week four days a week. Something is going to make you physically strong, because in a place where there’s going to be a lot of fear. The way you deal with crisis is number one thing.
You should do is feed your mind and you’re. Doing that get yourself new answers. Immerse yourself in new environments, get new voices have new perspectives. Ask some new questions. Isn’t that what we’ve been doing here.
Right and we’re, doing it together, bringing all these people together, I basically to create innovation in your life and marketing. I’m assembled here: 19 people. You assembled five days, your life and we’re just walking day and night.
It’s. The total immersion of what i’ve, taught to you in innovation. It’s, really what it is, but it’s, going to continue for it to continue that we’ve, also been managing your state to a great extent.
All right, most of you, don’t, go home in 4 or 5 days. I start clapping like crazy and screaming, and shaking you don’t. Do that you’re, so right, and so somebody gonna go like wow. It doesn’t, kill the same as at the seminar and stuff.
No, I’m back here by myself and my people – aren’t doing this, but some of you will go home and initiate this, you’re, going to have your physiology 5. Your five minutes of physiology shift once an hour once every 90 minutes or no more than once, every 2 hours you’re, going to start your morning with everybody, you’re, going to bring in and get some little audio clip of Something from a movie or something that blasts across the room and have anybody stand at attention.
You’re, going to do some crazy stuff. If you’re smart robber, examples can see what they do. They got the most crazy stuff going on there all the stuff that I doing seminars they do every day at their location, with their people and people can’t wait to get the work than they’re in a certain State.
So if I were you, I’d feed my mind. You’re. Doing that I & # 39. Ve been conditioned my body because your body is going to give you the strength to follow through there’s. Nobody in this room can’t afford to do that and I don’t care.
If that’s, going for a walk and as you’re doing the walk, you’re, doing what I call my hour of power or 15 minutes. You know to thrive where you’re, just putting yourself in state may be doing incantations.
You got to do something they get the blood moving through you on a consistent basis and once in a while it’s, really pushing you beyond your comfort zone. So when you get beyond your comfort zone in your mental side, there’s already a reservoir there.
We’re going to talking about your CI, so V. Your mind sees your mind with the information see to mind with examples in the stories part of why here’s good for you to see all these people that are succeeding in this tough environment.
How many found that to be valuable? Just as a balanced perspective, say I it’ll go read some other biographies but feed your mind, everyday condition your body every day and then the third thing has become a master of influence by asking the right questions and that’s.
What I want to talk to you about questions are the answer. You want new answers for your life. You need new questions. You’re not getting through to somebody. The answer is getting through to them is not to talk more.
It’s to ask them more. It’s. To get underneath this to discover number. I said the other day to influence another human being. You have to know what already what influences them you can’t do that by talking to them.
If I tell you something you can doubt it, but if you tell me by my answer, your question, you tell me how it is it’s, true that’s, the basis of influence for those who are more sophisticated, a lot so With influence, you can tell stories and metaphors you can influence by example, you can influence by rewards or by paying, but the fastest way to influence is to get inside of somebody by questions.
Questions are the answers. If you want to give somebody a gift, ask them the right question, because all we experience in life, if I say to you sabha Davos, come to create some boxes. What is your just experience? Freedom, your brain just search, ten million files, one don’t, know what that means.
There’s, nothing in there. No, I don’t know what that is right. Our experiences we don’t experience life. We experience our association to whatever we’re stimulated by. So, if I said to you, I want to tell you a story about my senior year in high school and I started telling you about my senior in high school and there was this girl.
I was so in love with by the way I can go on and on, but you’re. Not experiencing my story. You’re experiencing your story. You went back to high school soon, as I start to tell it and you’re experiencing somebody.
You were interested in very quickly. You’re, going for a reference point. You can relate to how many see what I & #. 39 m talking about here. If I want you to think about your mother, all I got to talk about mine, because the only way you understand things is by referencing it.
So questions caused you to go inside in reference things. The right question can change anything who’s been with me at date with destiny, where I take okay, so people been date with destiny. Now I do a program only twice a year, my favorite program, because frankly I’m already late enough foundational things, and now I can just do my art.
My art is I give people these things. Do they stand up and doesn’t matter? What’s going to happen? Somebody may stand up, and you know they’re frustrated because they’ve achieved everything you ever wanted and they made 100 million dollars, and I can’t figure out why they’re depressed.
A real example of a lady’s worth with just the other day, completely depressed, so much so that you say I don’t think she gave us a reference point of somebody. I don’t, know the person’s name and I guess they’re famous in our community.
Somebody killed themselves and she was I don’t. Think people should be upset with him. I think you should be able to take care of us what’s? I’m telling you all right, so it’s like I’ve, never lost a suicide in 30 years out of thousand small things.
I’m, most proud of my entire life. Children with all people, and I’ll – tell you that’s, a brag and say it because once you know human beings needs, you know what they’re. Really after and you know how to ask the right questions, you can connect them to any new experience of life.
You want them to be in, and I know all human beings have a need for certainty. Certainly, they can be okay, they can avoid pain, they can have comfort or pleasure. I think it certainly is fundamental comfort if you have no certainty that this floor was going to hold you up and we’re on the eighth floor right now.
You know you might not be paying attention to me. I’ve. Never once I did a seminar in Switzerland and was about 2500 people. I wasn’t a huge seminar, but we are in this building. It was a building, usually did trade shows in just like this, when you drive trucks in and so forth, but as we jumped, everybody was jumping in the room like that we were.
I took the house to a different level. The floor start going up and down, as we’re doing this this much up and down like a wave by the way. How fast you think people can stop jumping. I can feel we’re all feeling people looked around, so I called the building people and we had a most community, this inspection and everything else.
Now this is the first day of a three-day upw seminar, so those who do not least the power within with a fire, walk and so forth know it’s. Make sure we did this week. Look like nothing because the intensity is in a whole different level, but it becomes fun because you become so strong so quickly.
You’re, not sitting so much. You’re in it and I can’t. Do three days of evil sitting for that many hours they do. They need bored out of mind it. Wouldn’t change the Vino transformation, so they come back to say the building is fine.
It has this much play it’s, just trucks usually drive run alongside and go up and down up and down it’s. A different motion, I said: are you absolutely positive? No problem, so I tell everybody that we’re still going to jump up and down now this is going to require some leadership.
Does that make sense what I got to do, I got to be able to what influenced them and by the way, what do you think the likelihood is what everybody told me starting there’s, just no way you’re going to Do it I said: well, if they don’t, do it we might as well not through the event, because you can’t physically sit still and not move, because the emotion is created by motion.
So I said it’s not going to work for three days now. It must happen so since it must my job as leader is to in Folsom. So first thing I got to do is I got our own ale importances? I can’t get unit if I don’t own it.
How many beers now to say I, if I own it like 90 percent or 95 percent, will I get everybody? Yes or no? He & # 39. Ll. Give you a walk on fire by 90 percent. I think it would probably do well. I got owned by the what, if I said.
Okay, we walk on fire. Okay, who wants to go first, not me, somebody else, someone else go first, I as a leader. I always go first, all right that’s, my job, so all I did was I divided up the room and I realized they needed certainty.
So I said: watch we’re, going to do this with a small segment. If I doing the three teams – so I divided one section second section third section and we all jumped like I’m jumping the room, didn’t boom stop and that’s.
What we did we’ve. All weekend long, these sections in the room, didn’t shake. I think I had to give them certainty until they forgot about. It was totally fine right, but whenever you’re going to cop or something sometimes you’re going to break it down, but you got to provide this need for certainty.
Everybody has a need for uncertainty. Everybody has a need for variety. We all have a need to feel like there’s. A surprise in our life. We’re love surprises, raise your hand, say aye, you, like the surprises, you want.
The surprises you don’t want. You call problems in the true, but you need those two to feel alive. See you like surprises that you’re certain you’re, not sure they’re going to happen, but if they do you’re.
Certain it’ll feel good doesn’t it true. So people need for certainty, they need uncertainty, needs variety, they need stimulation. People haven & # 39. T need to feel significant to feel unique to feel special to feel important.
If you help people meet that need trust me, the world is yours. Remember many years ago I sleep when his good friend in mind. I love him. He’s, one of those brilliant people. I know he’s, not only a genius entrepreneur, but he is an artist.
He’s, one of most creative people. Steve, could talk about this, this lectern and he could make it the most magnificent lectern. You could possibly imagine Tony look at the Magnus and he could even just describe things in a way they’re just unbelievable, so we’re.
Having dinner the very first time we ever met, it was New Year’s. One year and fireworks going off, and he and I like totally into it – and we’re talking about influence, that this is the ultimate skill in life of any business owner and that that’s.
His only job is influence. He creates things he loves that, but I can cradle this guess how valuable this is. If I can’t influence you that it’s, valuable for you, zero. It dies please in my house, so we’re, describing this and I’m, describing the six human needs, certainty and uncertainty, and when I got the significance he lit up like a Christmas tree.
Those Tony, if you want many billions, if you want to make billions of dollars, that’s, the one to give people if you get them the link buying your product makes them more significant. They’ll, spend any meta money.
They are. You should think about it. People get these little handbags. We buy these handbags. He said they cost nothing to make. We’d, be thousands of dollars because it & # 39. S got somebody’s, initials on it.
It’s, not even name better. I guess he wanted to make it across 1/100 of the price. One came for the price we built the win and then the Encore to point last one to point: seven billion dollars for hotel, but guess what? What everybody else is freaking out you go over the wind right now it’s full because the people who want to be known as the best I’ve got to go to the best place.
Is that the nice trucks you want to me Ford, neat connection and love, everybody needs connection. Everybody needs love. Is that all we want that significance floor is if we think of a significant enough people will love us if I’m worth it.
If I’m enough, if I’m beautiful enough strong enough smart enough richness, intelligent enough playful, not funny enough something enough, then I’ll, be loved. So if you’re going to influence somebody, you got to know what’s.
Influencing them is the need for certainty. When you talk about change, you just mess with that. True there’s, a need for uncertainty, but you got to fill now that’s, positive uncertainty, a variety they need to feel significant and gosh.
What did you bring this new thing into change and it doesn’t work out as well? For me, I feel stupid. I look like I failed. I feel insignificant love. Gosh I don’t know if I’ll, even love myself. If this doesn’t go well, how many follow the pattern of what people get concerned about right? So these first four needs everybody finds a way to meet.
Even if they have to blame somebody else or work really hard or make up a story in their head, everybody finds a way to fix certain every finds, a way that variety everybody has a way to be significant.
Everything is a way to at least connect it. It’s, not love, but ultimately the final team needs is everyone has to grow. Then we talked about this. First-Day progress equals happiness. If you grow, you feel alive.
If you don’t grow, you feel like you’re dying, and so the input people peep out this need for growth and if they feel like they’re growing with you remember, I said you can use fear to Motivate them that work for a while, you can eat you, Santa’s.
That’ll work for a long time too, but there is a limit to incentives. The only thing makes people feel fully alive long term is they feel happy because they’re growing. They’re expanding everyone tonguey talked about how they took this process of becoming a buyer for Zappos, but they broke it into more steps.
Still two years, but you were a buyer level, a by a higher qualified level B, level C and people. I guess I made it progress growth. Finally, with the last need contribution – and you heard him – many others talk about – and you’ve seen the people here that are most successful feel like what they’re doing has a meaning beyond themselves.
Now I’m, reminding you these six needs and very quickly here, because if you are not going to influence other people, we have to know what already influences them and of those six needs who’s at who has? Who has all six of these needs? What you said, everyone who here has a need to be loved at some level of the admitted, I least connected, say I, who you needs to feel unique.
Special important, significant resilience AI, including people, though I don’t, need to be special. No, no. I don’t know I don’t need that I’m, a Christian or I’m, a Jew or Muslim, or I’m, not religious.
I’m spiritual. They find a way to be unique. Everybody needs this. It’s human nature, so we need all these needs to be met, but we don’t need them all. Equally, we’ve learned the value of some of these six more than others, some value, certainly more than anything else, and so they live their life trying to meet that need, and if you can it convince them.
How exciting this new projects going to be you just messed up totally what you got to tell them. Is you know what, if we don’t change this, you realize what’s going to happen? Do you think that what we have right now, certain solid you can understand? This is evaporating between us if you and I are gonna – have any surgery at all.
This is what we must do immediately and they’re like let’s, make it happen right. If you know somebody who’s more variety driven some people at the top of the list. They all want certainty. They all want uncertainty, we all want them all.
We have 10 down to that. We value more than any others. Those two are the driving force in a person, so somebody’s, variety driven and you & # 39. Ve got okay, we’re, going to keep doing these same things, because we got to keep fundamentally doing these elements and the change that we’re, making they’re.
Not that big, because you’re trying to convince people so that they won’t, be too fearful. You lost that person. You have to pull them aside, stay low. You might understand something here. This is a fairly new gang without to begin really you’ll have their total interest.
You know, John here John, you’re, doing a great job, keeping the foundation going, but I need your help me partner, because we’re going to enter something that & # 39. S never been done before. If somebody’s, significance, driven which all of us have a need for significance, but at the top of the list you got to, let them know what’s going to come of this.
It’s, going to make the game of this business so different than anybody else. How we’re, going to be better than anybody else. How we’re going to take market share. We’re, going to be number one. You’re gonna have their full attention and when somebody is connected and loved driven at the top, how you can approach them come on? How do you approach them? What do you say? Listen we as a family got to do this.
Let me tell you: we’re going to do. We’re, going to be stronger. We’re, going to love that love our customers, where I take care of better than we ever have these. The things are going to connect us to each other and to our clients like.
Never before you really look at our family. We’re going to build by implementing this therein if their growth revenue will be obvious. There are you don’t mean how to explain it. They’ll. Just see the growth opportunity and go for the contribution.
Driven is very obvious, so you have to be able to bring your message to someone a way that make sense now telling them is one thing, but asking them is even more powerful see. If I tell you, you can feel I’m selling, you persuading you influencing you, but if I ask you a question where you tell me you own it, it’s exactly what happens.
It’s, a blows when they take people for the first week, no matter what position they have and they put them through an immersion right. They put them through boot camp and at the end of that week, what do they do with those people? Do you remember they offer them what two thousand dollars to leave right now, 2,000.
Bucks believe now that makes these people see instead of sample selling you more a were the best culture they give enough information enough experience to hopefully get a good hit, but now it’s. The ultimate piece I have to ask myself am I on board or not? Can I ask you, you might even be asked me? Oh yeah, I’m ready to go, but for me to give up that money, I’m going to say: is this worth it? Is this worth more than two thousand? Is this the place I’m going to is this? I got to ask all those questions and then once I answer them and I’ve answered them.
I’m in come with all the difference here say I. It’s, a really really powerful distinction. Instead of telling you can tell tell tell but ultimately going to ask the question that brings someone there.
So if you’ve ever watched me with somebody suicidal or someone’s having a major challenge or somebody’s happening, let’s. Go to another level. I’ll. Tell stories I’ll do examples, but ultimately the moments of influence happen in moments.
When I ask questions and they make this connection in their head, I’ll, say hey. If you continue, this tell me how that’s going to meet your dream. I do this with my daughter, I’ll, never forget my daughter.
Jolie always wanted to be a dancer on Broadway and she was very talented. Of course, I’m, her father all right. So of course she’s, talented right, but at one point you know she’s, going to college and doing really well.
She was based in Los Angeles and she was winning all these dance competitions. It’s cabled to Christmas, and we’re sitting down and I said to her this question I said honey. How are you doing on your dream and she said what do you mean she goes? I’m doing great in school.
I got straight A’s and I’m going to dance classes. I said I know, but I want to know how are you doing on your dream? I didn’t tell her how she was doing on the dream. You follow the do things here. I can see Charlie.
I’m concerned. You got straight A’s in school and you’re, doing great dance classes, but you’re, not focusing on your dream. I don’t think your dreams coming about. If I start out with that would work, I got to ask, I got to make her break her own, what break her? What pattern, because what do you mean? I said your dream: you know what it is.
What is it well? She goes well, of course, the dance on Broadway I said uh-huh, and what do you doing? She goes why I’m. Going to schools got straight A’s and I’m dancing. I said: are you dancing against people? You’re better than or people that are better than you.
Please make your answer less. I’m better than them. I said, of course, because you’re winning every time that’s a clue. So my question is: how do you get better playing against people? You’re better than if you go on a tennis court and you play against somebody that’s twice as good as you are, even if your lousy tennis player, are you going to get better or worse playing against them? As time goes by which one you have to just to stay on the court, if you sit across from somebody you skillset is lower than yours, even though you want to practice as hard as you can.
What’s going to happen your game? Eventually it’s going to go down. You can just watch your processes. Now. If I said to her, you need to leave California move to New York and compete with other people.
I probably wouldn’t work a well, but I start out with how you doing on your dream and then I got into safe. What is your dream really? I know what the answer was by the way, the best way to influence people.
If you’re trying to serve them, as you better know what you want to take them towards as a leader, I got to know where I’m, going to take you that’s, my job, it’S, not a parent and you’re, not leading you keep leading you.
You know much of a parent that doesn’t mean you, kids can & # 39. T inform you, but there are points in life when you go to lead them and you lead anyone wherever you want. As long as you know what the outcome is, and you ask the right questions I can, I can take a deck of cards.
Have you take out any cards see what the card is and I can lead to that card. You play gout. For example, you know the Ace of Hearts, the King of Hearts – and I say to you limit your question. A deck of cards has 52 cards in it, but they’re broken up into four different suits aren’t.
They. What are they stays and what are they gone yeah so, as you think, of those take a one, take one hearts and some of you won’t pick heart, so I’ll, say pick another one and if you only go down Off a Eddy and a skinny, I’m, saying that leaves until we finally get darts right and then I’ll, say out those hearts.
You know there’s, one that’s, values more than the other one. Well, what is it I mean? I can lead you, everyone! I’m, going to get you to say the King of Hearts. Today I’m going to take you wherever I want to go, questions that I didn’t know first, so I say to her by competing these people, who you’re better than because you told me better than them.
So I’m, not saying she’s, saying it are you going to get better what happens in these moments? She’s, making new connections in her head, new new, no nuances, new beliefs and she says well. No. I’m. Not I submission another question: what’s, the life cycle on a dandy I mean, can you be the answer when you’re 40 start when you & # 39? Re 40 35, make it on Broadway.
She goes no as an old to you. So really, how do you know, like I said? Oh just Audion, a long 21, I said we win, would now be a good time for you to start now. Yeah it’s, good idea. So what do you mean? I said, honey everything I’ve done in my life has been based on modeling, but also there’s, something in me that most people not realizes really made me successful.
That’s. A sense of urgency I do not settle, I do not wait, you wait and it’s over. If you allow something to distract you at the moment, you’re about to get the most important information you need in your life.